Lotus Cup UK Speed Championship – MIRA (Round 4)

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Saturday was the 4th round of the Lotus Cup UK Speed Championship, this time hosted by the Bentley Drivers Club at the MIRA Proving Grounds, Nuneaton.

It was an amazing venue, and there were some absolutely incredible cars there, including Bentleys, TVRs and Austin Healeys. In total there were 94 cars competing, and it was a real privilege to be a part of such a wonderful day of driving.

MIRA have a very strict rule on no photography, so strict that they took my camera off me at the gates and stuck a tamper-proof sticker over the lens of my iphone. I wouldn’t have minded so much, but when I drove into the paddock the only space free in the LOTRDC area had a rainbow painted on the tarmac! I PARKED ON A RAINBOW! I parked on a rainbow and was unable to document this for posterity!

The Bentley chaps had a proper big marque, the sort of thing you have at weddings, with proper chairs in it, and a really cool touch screen time machine that told you your times and all sorts. The portaloos were pretty impressive too, with their faux marble walls and faux walnut vanity, floral art and and 3 types of hand wash to choose from!

We had two practices and two timed runs, I managed to knock 10 seconds off my time and my first timed run was 66.97. I knew what I was doing wrong, and I knew what I wanted to correct (I can’t always control myself as much as I’d like to!) but on my second run I was annoyingly 2 seconds slower. The reason? I got cramp in my right foot – I know, it sounds like a really lame excuse!

I came 10th out of 10 in my class, just 1/2 a second behind the next driver apparently.  I don’t mind.  It was a good day. A chap called Hugh was celebrating his birthday and gave me a flapjack.

Overall I placed 67 out of 94, which I think is alright really.

Anyway, I can’t share any photos of the day, because I don’t have any, but what I can do is show you some random pictures of the cheap and cheerful, but not cheerful, hotel we stayed in the previous night!

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So, the Royal Court Hotel, hey? A country house built in 1874 by William Hillman (as in, Hillman Motor Company), sounds pretty nice, right? Ha ha ha!

From the reviews on Trip Advisor  that I’d read, I imagined it was going to be like staying in a hotel where the owners had died 30 years ago, but no one had noticed. It wasn’t even that fun!

Hillman’s beautiful residence has been eaten up by an ugly monster. The original ‘Keresley Hall’ is swallowed up by a kind of ‘Eastern Block’ extension of mammoth proportions.

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When we checked in we had to pay up front, not just a swipe of the card, but a full payment. I asked if this was because they’d had a lot of guests who’d not paid their bill? They said no, but I had my suspicions.

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Our room was a room, and it had a bed in it. We really only needed somewhere to kip for the night, so it was okay. I suppose. (It was only £52 for bed and breakfast for two).

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The restaurant only served carvery, I suppose I should have realised that the ‘Carver Restaurant’ was nothing to do with carver chairs. According to the hotel brochure, ‘The Stately and spacious Main hall is now the Carver restaurant and still maintains its original windows and front door. This is now situated behind the carvery unit.’ 

Carvery unit? We wondered if they had a condiment station too.

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Neither of use wanted to eat a carvery dinner. Apparently, if your not having carvery your not coming in the restaurant, so Adam and I ate our bad meat and chips dinners in the bar, at low tables. There were some women there on a ‘Groupon deal’ and they asked to have their photo taken with Adam. It was a strange evening and I was glad to get my Kit Kat pudding from the vending machine and go to bed.

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We got up at 7am and went for breakfast. It wasn’t carvery, but we were allowed in the restaurant. I felt sad for the house as I ate my coco pops. What a beautiful place, ruined. There were some woman in their dressing gowns eating sausages. One woman was wearing an Iron Man onesie, which was impressive.

According to another hotel brochure, and under the heading of Elegant Rooms –  ‘All 210 En-suite Bedrooms have been decorated to reflect our surroundings. All have Colour TV, Direct Dial Telephones, Hairdryer, Trouser Press and Complimentary Tray.’

Complimentary Tray?!

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I was glad to leave. The room was really awful. You could see where the door had been broken open, there was a big join in the carpet which didn’t quite meet, the old square TV (I wouldn’t mind, but when there were supposed to be 3 people on screen we could only see this middle one!) was plugged into a big blue coiled up extension lead and there was something brown on the mouthpiece of the vintage 1980‘s phone. Now, I’m not saying it was poo, but I don’t think it was chocolate!

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